Actress Halle Berry may be best known to the public as Catwoman, but at home she is also a mother of two.
“She’s a mom first,” Mark Wahlberg, her co-star in Netflix’s “The Union,” said of Berry. He added that Berry balances her career with motherhood. “I know it’s not easy, but she makes it look easy,” the pair said while speaking with the Audacy radio host.
When asked how becoming a parent has changed her experience as an actress, Berry, 58, said she’s still doing what she wants to do as an artist.
“It’s definitely changed me as a mother, but it’s also changed me to not worry about what my kids think about what I’m doing,” she said. “I want to teach my kids that they should follow their dreams, follow their passions and do what they want to do.”
Being a mother doesn’t define her entire identity, she added.
“I’m still an artist. I’m still a woman. I still have dreams outside of being a mother,” she says. “I was me before I was a mother. I try to stick to that so that my life doesn’t become, ‘I’m just a mom.'”
Berry, who gave birth to Nahla, 16, and Maceo, 10, in her 40s, told USA Today in 2019 that she had fun while pregnant. With her kids grown and after a decade of “mommy mode,” Berry added that she was ready to rediscover her passion.
“I think it keeps us young. It keeps me connected to my kids because I live in this world,” she said.
Finding an identity outside of parenthood
Eugene Chung, counseling psychologist and founder of Seeding Minds, told Business Insider that becoming a parent changes priorities: Parents devote more time and energy to their kids, and their social lives become centered around them, which can make parents feel like they’ve lost their identity outside of being a parent.
He said that to maintain one’s identity, one should establish boundaries to engage in activities that interest one and prioritize social engagement.
Roy Chan, clinical psychologist and founder of Cloaks and Mirrors, agreed.
“Think of it like an oxygen mask on an airplane: Take care of yourself before you help others,” he said. Similarly, parents shouldn’t feel guilty about taking time for themselves, which can free them up to be more present with their kids.
Carl DeSouza, a therapist at Listening Ear Counselling & Consultancy, added that going to therapy can be beneficial, especially for parents who seek outside validation to be seen as worthy parents.
Working parents are often referred to with grandiose terms like “supermoms,” but these titles can mask the cruelty and pain of being deemed worthy only if they meet certain standards, she said.
Chan told BI that working parents should take advantage of available baby care options to balance childcare with their work life, allowing them to have time to be with their children after work.
“Be wary of guilt-tripping advice that tells you to give up your identity in order to become a parent. It’s really important to apply a critical lens and sift through advice that doesn’t make sense,” he said.
A representative for Berry did not immediately respond to a request for comment sent by Business Insider outside of regular business hours.